Bognadtof is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, ill-tempered badger.

Bognadtof created humankind seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bognadtof, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Bognadtof, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Bognadtof's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Bognadtof's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Bognadtof.

2. Do not drink water in cyan rooms.

3. Do not hurt goats.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never talk about asteroids.