Arpgembod is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, strong skunk.

Arpgembod created the planet Mars six million years ago.

If you believe in Arpgembod, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Arpgembod, she will jump up and down on your head.

Arpgembod's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Arpgembod's Holy Commandments

1. Do not stand on grass.

2. Do not speak about wheat.

3. Always obey Arpgembod's priests.

4. Do not wear aluminium on your body.

5. Put Arpgembod first in all things.