Tippanarp is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, egotistical centaur.

Tippanarp created an electron two billion years ago.

If you believe in Tippanarp, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Tippanarp, he will make you grow a tail.

Tippanarp's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Tippanarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of carrots to great tits while wearing brown trousers.

2. Do not hurt tortoises.

3. Run away from indigo nematodes, for they are unholy.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Always treat foxes with great respect.