Hitflatlarg is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unjust weasel.

Hitflatlarg created viruses three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hitflatlarg, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hitflatlarg, she will destroy your home planet.

Hitflatlarg's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Hitflatlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

2. Always help sick horses.

3. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.