Armjentarp is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, witty newt.

Armjentarp created an electron six billion years ago.

If you believe in Armjentarp, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Armjentarp, it will turn you into a plant.

Armjentarp's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Armjentarp's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear purple clothing.

2. Armjentarp loves monkeys, so they must be respected.

3. Always treat aardvarks with great respect.

4. Do not shave your head.

5. Do not covet oxen.