Lakhakjam is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, two-faced ant.

Lakhakjam created silver nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Lakhakjam, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Lakhakjam, it will turn you into a goat.

Lakhakjam's most sacred site is Úbeda in Spain.

Lakhakjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about peanuts.

2. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Lakhakjam must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Do not stand on grass.