Cebwapsan is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, cheerful ant.

Cebwapsan created the Black Eye Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cebwapsan, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Cebwapsan, she will turn you into a hamster.

Cebwapsan's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Cebwapsan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Do not hurt seals.

3. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Cebwapsan on top of all buildings.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.