Xucnillbugsandsannibbop Jammonkinyam is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, tiresome crow.

Xucnillbugsandsannibbop Jammonkinyam created time and space two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xucnillbugsandsannibbop Jammonkinyam, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Xucnillbugsandsannibbop Jammonkinyam, she will turn you into a snail.

Xucnillbugsandsannibbop Jammonkinyam's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Xucnillbugsandsannibbop Jammonkinyam's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place in white.

5. Never think ill of sick whales.