Satrullbun is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, sage faun.

Satrullbun created humanity four million years ago.

If you believe in Satrullbun, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Satrullbun, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Satrullbun's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Satrullbun's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention sharks.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never think ill of sick turtles.

4. Do not shave your arms.

5. Put Satrullbun first in all things.