Pomstanfen is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, unsympathetic hyena.

Pomstanfen created gold seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Pomstanfen, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Pomstanfen, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Pomstanfen's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Pomstanfen's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Always help sick nematodes.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Erect a giant tin sculpture of Pomstanfen in the centre of the settlement.

5. Run away if seven swans approach from the south.