Yamfunnel is a god.

He takes the form of a two thousand metre long, contented goat.

Yamfunnel created the Cigar Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yamfunnel, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Yamfunnel, he will turn you into a duck.

Yamfunnel's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Yamfunnel's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Yamfunnel's priests.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Run away if nine gulls approach from the south.

4. Never laugh near snakes.

5. Learn four new languages a year.