Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, kind wyvern.

Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan created energy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan's Holy Commandments

1. Put Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan first in all things.

2. Do not wear silver on your body.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Mabvanfetquatpidzanquilltan.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.