Cutjapdin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, confident troll.

Cutjapdin created the cosmos four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Cutjapdin, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Cutjapdin, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Cutjapdin's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Cutjapdin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Always look after injured mice.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

5. Always make sure there are no hamsters in a building before entering it.