Satlidbag is a god.

It takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, blissful gorilla.

Satlidbag created a charm quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Satlidbag, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Satlidbag, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Satlidbag's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Satlidbag's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Satlidbag.

2. Satlidbag loves great tits, so they must be honoured.

3. Never look at comets.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not kill swans.