Ranyimdityarpbabster is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, unjust pigeon.

Ranyimdityarpbabster created the Tadpole Galaxy five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ranyimdityarpbabster, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Ranyimdityarpbabster, he will laugh at you.

Ranyimdityarpbabster's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Ranyimdityarpbabster's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if five dolphins approach from the east.

2. Erect a giant iron sculpture of Ranyimdityarpbabster in the centre of the settlement.

3. You must never eat onions.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Ranyimdityarpbabster.

5. Never think about quantum mechanics near eagles while wearing black jumpers and balancing seven tin spheres on your neck.