Canyatbess Wodragvanman is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, prudent turtle.

Canyatbess Wodragvanman created humankind nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Canyatbess Wodragvanman, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Canyatbess Wodragvanman, it will turn you into a tree.

Canyatbess Wodragvanman's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Canyatbess Wodragvanman's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Sharks are unholy and should not be approached.