Bapcitsab is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, almighty crocodile.

Bapcitsab created matter eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bapcitsab, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bapcitsab, she will be mildly annoyed.

Bapcitsab's most sacred site is Saint-Sauvan in France.

Bapcitsab's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Never hurt shrews.

4. Hide if three mice approach from the south.

5. Do not wear aluminium on your body.