Dobjanrag Nelgigcap is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, humorless tortoise.

Dobjanrag Nelgigcap created the planet Saturn seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dobjanrag Nelgigcap, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Dobjanrag Nelgigcap, he will come to you in dreams.

Dobjanrag Nelgigcap's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Dobjanrag Nelgigcap's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if nine tortoises approach from the east.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never wear purple jumpers.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Always help eagles in need.