Lenomtmin Xemwipxuc Hapmigtap is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, unjust sheep.

Lenomtmin Xemwipxuc Hapmigtap created gold four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lenomtmin Xemwipxuc Hapmigtap, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Lenomtmin Xemwipxuc Hapmigtap, she will turn you into a worm.

Lenomtmin Xemwipxuc Hapmigtap's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Lenomtmin Xemwipxuc Hapmigtap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your arms.

2. Do not drink alcohol.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Always help sick great tits.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Lenomtmin Xemwipxuc Hapmigtap.