Sogbithas is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, all-powerful gerbil.

Sogbithas created snails nine million years ago.

If you believe in Sogbithas, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Sogbithas, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Sogbithas' most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Sogbithas' Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if eight manatees approach from the west.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never talk about ultrasonics.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Sogbithas must be the most important thing in your life.