Ripvonstaf is a god.

She takes the form of a large, vain gorilla.

Ripvonstaf created the Sombrero Galaxy three billion years ago.

If you believe in Ripvonstaf, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Ripvonstaf, she will turn you into a duck.

Ripvonstaf's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Ripvonstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Always treat snails with great respect.

3. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never write about enzymes.