Badtom is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, unfair narwhal.

Badtom created Mount Everest six billion years ago.

If you believe in Badtom, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Badtom, he will be very unhappy.

Badtom's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Badtom's Holy Commandments

1. Do not make images of living things.

2. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never eat peas.

4. Erect a large silver sculpture of Badtom on top of all buildings.

5. Always make sure there are no rats in a room before entering it.