Dussranfut is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, overgenerous slug.

Dussranfut created the cosmos three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dussranfut, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Dussranfut, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Dussranfut's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Dussranfut's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in the presence of birds.

2. You must pray to Dussranfut four times a day.

3. Always make sure there are no foxes in a building before entering it.

4. Never talk about dark energy near seals while wearing green tights.

5. Always help pigs.