Henzedhotcanteen is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, omniscient grasshopper.

Henzedhotcanteen created oxygen six billion years ago.

If you believe in Henzedhotcanteen, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Henzedhotcanteen, she will turn you into a tree.

Henzedhotcanteen's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Henzedhotcanteen's Holy Commandments

1. Henzedhotcanteen loves sharks, so they must be respected.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.