Bessbitstikdanquilldudpodhak is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, two-faced fairy.

Bessbitstikdanquilldudpodhak created the Andromeda Galaxy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bessbitstikdanquilldudpodhak, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bessbitstikdanquilldudpodhak, it will torture you forever.

Bessbitstikdanquilldudpodhak's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Bessbitstikdanquilldudpodhak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Hide from red rats for they are unholy.

3. Run away if nine geese approach from the south.

4. Put Bessbitstikdanquilldudpodhak first in all things.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.