Waphadbop is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, happy snake.

Waphadbop created bats three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Waphadbop, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Waphadbop, he will manifest in front of you.

Waphadbop's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Waphadbop's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if four hamsters approach from the north.

2. Never go into pink rooms.

3. Do not leap in public.

4. Do not hurt bats.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.