Vonpodtik is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, bad-tempered hydra.

Vonpodtik created a strange quark seven million years ago.

If you believe in Vonpodtik, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Vonpodtik, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Vonpodtik's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Vonpodtik's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never mention moths.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Do not make images of living things.

5. Do not stand on grass.