Targcinwon is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, all-knowing troll.

Targcinwon created the universe nine million years ago.

If you believe in Targcinwon, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Targcinwon, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Targcinwon's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Targcinwon's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into red rooms.

2. Never think about solid mechanics.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate voles.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Always take life seriously.