Flamdadqueeg is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, bad-tempered crocodile.

Flamdadqueeg created a top quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flamdadqueeg, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Flamdadqueeg, she will not care.

Flamdadqueeg's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Flamdadqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Erect a large iron sculpture of Flamdadqueeg on top of all buildings.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

5. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.