Bepcutvab is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, witless porpoise.

Bepcutvab created the Tadpole Galaxy eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bepcutvab, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Bepcutvab, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Bepcutvab's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Bepcutvab's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never go into indigo rooms.