Kantinwod is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, sapient hedgehog.

Kantinwod created water seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Kantinwod, it will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Kantinwod, it will be very sad.

Kantinwod's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Kantinwod's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.

2. Never think about thermodynamics near seals while wearing turquoise boots and balancing four iron spheres on your legs.

3. Never mention dolphins.

4. Do not hop in public.

5. Never write about chlorophyll.