Zigkipjip is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, emotional pigeon.

Zigkipjip created Asia three billion years ago.

If you believe in Zigkipjip, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Zigkipjip, he will not care.

Zigkipjip's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Zigkipjip's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if nine tapirs approach from the west.

2. Never write about eukaryotes.

3. Do not take Zigkipjip's name in vain.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Always help sharks.