Bimnakfag is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, duplicitous elephant.

Bimnakfag created a bottom quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bimnakfag, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bimnakfag, she will be very unhappy.

Bimnakfag's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Bimnakfag's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the north.

2. Never mention tortoises.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Worship no other gods but Bimnakfag.

5. Never look in ponds.