Sashaptim is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, ruthless fox.

Sashaptim created the solar system three million years ago.

If you believe in Sashaptim, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Sashaptim, she will turn you into a mole.

Sashaptim's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Sashaptim's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from red nematodes for they are unholy.

2. Do not speak about figs.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate otters.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never wear brown dresses.