Mapdamdagjab is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, calm crab.

Mapdamdagjab created the Milkyway eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Mapdamdagjab, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Mapdamdagjab, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Mapdamdagjab's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Mapdamdagjab's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place in magenta.

3. Never think about dwarf planets.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.