Dudfommit is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, unfair rhinoceros.

Dudfommit created light seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Dudfommit, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Dudfommit, he will turn you into a hamster.

Dudfommit's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Dudfommit's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Pray towards the south.

3. Do not wear magenta clothing.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of carbon.

5. Never talk about solid mechanics near mice while wearing green jumpers.