Bogdoss Lakmapbam is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, omniscient bear.

Bogdoss Lakmapbam created the Large Magellanic Cloud three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bogdoss Lakmapbam, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Bogdoss Lakmapbam, it will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Bogdoss Lakmapbam's most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Bogdoss Lakmapbam's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about planets.

2. Your children must be taught to worship Bogdoss Lakmapbam.

3. Bogdoss Lakmapbam loves capybaras, so they must be respected.

4. Always help sick tortoises.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.