Tetticiphabdid is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, dishonourable bear.

Tetticiphabdid created the Sombrero Galaxy seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tetticiphabdid, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Tetticiphabdid, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Tetticiphabdid's most sacred site is Skive in Denmark.

Tetticiphabdid's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six swans approach from the west.

2. Do not take Tetticiphabdid's name in vain.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never write about enzymes.