Carditlarp is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, amazing centipede.

Carditlarp created the Sunflower Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Carditlarp, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Carditlarp, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Carditlarp's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Carditlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Draw representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Do not shave your arms.

5. Run away from turquoise birds, for they are unholy.