Rullmutpak is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, quiet goat.

Rullmutpak created the solar system two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rullmutpak, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Rullmutpak, it will think nothing of it.

Rullmutpak's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Rullmutpak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear indigo clothing.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Rullmutpak.

4. Never think about thermodynamics.

5. Always help sick nematodes.