Yikveentab is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, ruthless parrot.

Yikveentab created the Milkyway four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yikveentab, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Yikveentab, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Yikveentab's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Yikveentab's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray in complete darkness.

2. Always help birds.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Do not wear gold on your body.

5. Do not dye your hair blue.