Gongignanmapgubafflatjat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, kind jaguar.

Gongignanmapgubafflatjat created a down quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Gongignanmapgubafflatjat, he will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Gongignanmapgubafflatjat, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Gongignanmapgubafflatjat's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Gongignanmapgubafflatjat's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Always help moths in need.

3. Never feed onions to foxes while wearing ear rings.

4. Ants are not to be trusted.

5. Never think about the weak nuclear force.