Tadontwad is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, quiet warg.

Tadontwad created an up quark eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tadontwad, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Tadontwad, he will turn you into a goat.

Tadontwad's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Tadontwad's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

2. Pray towards the east.

3. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near manatees while wearing violet tights and balancing five silver spheres on your feet.

4. Always make sure there are no ants in a building before entering it.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate capybaras.