Arnbitshav is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, tiresome shrew.

Arnbitshav created the cosmos three million years ago.

If you believe in Arnbitshav, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Arnbitshav, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Arnbitshav's most sacred site is Paavola in Finland.

Arnbitshav's Holy Commandments

1. Hamsters are not to be trusted.

2. Worship no other gods but Arnbitshav.

3. Retreat if eight doves approach from the south.

4. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

5. Do not dye your hair yellow.