Logwikmut is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, wise gorilla.

Logwikmut created the Milkyway five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Logwikmut, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Logwikmut, he will jump up and down on your head.

Logwikmut's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Logwikmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about great tits.

2. Erect a giant gray sculpture of Logwikmut in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of silver.

4. Do not jump in public.

5. Do not cook food in pots.