Farnjanbam is a god.

It takes the form of a large, able wren.

Farnjanbam created viruses four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Farnjanbam, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Farnjanbam, it will ignore you.

Farnjanbam's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Farnjanbam's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if four goats approach from the west.

2. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

3. Do not speak about limes.

4. Always wear purple.

5. Never think ill of sick ducks.