Ganstafstrag is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, dishonest hummingbird.

Ganstafstrag created Mount Everest three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ganstafstrag, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Ganstafstrag, she will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Ganstafstrag's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Ganstafstrag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Monkeys are unholy and should not be approached.

3. You must love Ganstafstrag.

4. Never mention great tits.

5. Always make a point of helping unfortunate swans.