Bantarpyat is a god.

He takes the form of a very thin, proud shark.

Bantarpyat created dark energy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Bantarpyat, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bantarpyat, he will have a low opinion of you.

Bantarpyat's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Bantarpyat's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about black holes.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bantarpyat.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of iron.

4. You must pray to Bantarpyat three times a day.

5. Always treat voles with great respect.