Fobgamtif is a god.

She takes the form of a small, bad-tempered cobra.

Fobgamtif created a quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Fobgamtif, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Fobgamtif, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Fobgamtif's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Fobgamtif's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear orange shorts.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fobgamtif.

4. Never talk about gravity.

5. Always look after injured shrews.