Omtzakcum is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, merciless troll.

Omtzakcum created the universe five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Omtzakcum, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Omtzakcum, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Omtzakcum's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Omtzakcum's Holy Commandments

1. Always help frogs.

2. You must pray to Omtzakcum four times a day.

3. Never laugh near porpoises.

4. You must love Omtzakcum.

5. Show mercy to disobedient children.